A GUIDE TO BECOMING THE WORLD’S MOST POWERFUL PERSON

A dream, all a dream, that ends in nothing,
and leaves the sleeper where he lay down,
but I wish you to know that you inspired it.” – Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities


Sometimes I sit up all night,

and stay awake all day

not out of angst or dread,

but due to the fact that I am the WORLD’S MOST POWERFUL MAN.

That’s right, the

WORLD’S MOST POWERFUL MAN. I

am the most self-aware, functional, man to ever exist.

You ask,

“Why? How? …

… What? Prove it! …

Teach me! You’re arrogant!”

“WELL,” I SAY,

as the crowd moves in closer,

I am the WORLD’S MOST POWERFUL MAN because

I do not SLEEP.

The crowd hushes

”                                 ”

That’s right!,

I say,

While you lay defenseless in your beds, I

sit up and watch over the streets I own, sometimes

taking into my POWERFUL body natural supplements which I use as tools to maintain power,

caffeine is my Bible,

while I sit up and speak to God himself.

The bags under my eyes are medals of my Supreme Understanding.

The slouch in my step is a sign of my commitment to excellence, my

twisted perception, a more pure view of the world.

You speed around in your luxury automobile during the day, taking calls, feeling big

but when night falls and you lie down in bed, defenseless, unconscious, unaware, unknowing, unseen and unseeing,

small.

Some of you may laugh at me.

You say I will die of exhaustion.

You call me a gimmick, a joke, a fake, a poser, naive, cocky,

but tonight I will sit up and watch over my side of the earth –

during the day, I will watch over the Eastern peoples.

You ought to thank me.

Because all night I sit and wait and wait and wait and wait and wait and wait and wait wait and wait and and …